A Title in which I would write out all of Mike McGill's "I wonked this, I twerked that" dialogue from Animal Chin if I could remember it

Sean Bonnette- Skateboarding's Greatest Hits


I came across this album while finding the link for Jeff Rosenstock's new album for my last post. Sean Bonnette is the singer/songwriter of Andrew Jackson Jihad. My only experience with that band is seeing them at Bomb the Music Industry!'s last show and then listening to various songs of theirs on the drive back from said show. This is nothing against them at all, it's not like I dislike them or anything, but I find that I listen to and have so much music that there are just some bands I never get around to. Maybe I will someday! But for now, I am more or less completely ignorant to Andrew Jackson Jihad.

But this album intrigued me a lot, mainly because of its title. On this release, Sean covers songs from his favourite skate videos, which I think is amazing. As much as the skating obviously makes a part, sometimes a skater is paired with a song and the two inform each others styles and it creates this perfect synergy. I know some people don't "get" skate videos because it's just guys skating, but when one is done well it just becomes hypnotizing and draws you in. It inspires you, sure to go out and skate, but in reality that feeling is "I can do this if I work hard enough. I can push myself to learn this." It can be this amazing ethereal feeling that puts you on a high for the rest of the day. And the songs are instrumental to that.

That's why I think this EP (I guess?) is so awesome. I'm seeing somebody else's ties to skate parts through the songs and I love that. To me, skateboarding has always been a social activity that ties me to others. No matter who they are or what they like or what we have in common, we both skateboard and that is all that matters while we are both on skateboards.

The album was made to raise money for Skate After School, which is an organization to help teach kids skateboarding and get them involved with what can be a great social and physical activity. Skateboarding was absolutely crucial to my development as a person. It exposed me to new music, new art and always gave me something positive to do with my friends. The fact that I could return to Toronto at any time (barring this damn snow) and ask Paul, Damien or Pat "Hey, do you want to go skate?" and that they would most likely respond "Yes." gives me a ton of comfort.

I really like his choice of songs and think they turn out exceptionally well. Personal favourites are the Guided by Voices and Modern English covers, though the Slayer cover is particularly weird and awesome. I also like the songs because I love the videos they come from. Welcome to Hell and Sorry? Yes. Instantly, I can pull up Maldonado and Saari's parts and each video's aesthetic. His choice of skaters is also fucking primo.

If I had to pick 6 Skateboarding Greatest Hits?

1. Sweet Apple- "Do You Remember" (C1RCA, Thrasher King of the Road 2010)
2. Iron Maiden- "Hallowed Be Thy Name" (Jamie Thomas, Toy Machine Welcome to Hell)
3. AFI- "The Boy Who Destroyed the World" (Rodney Mullen, 411 I Love Skateboarding)
4. Lemmy- "Stand by Me" (Geoff Rowley, Flip Extremely Sorry)
5. The Jackson 5- "I Want You Back" (Guy Mariano, Blind Video Days)
6. Husker Du- "The Real World" (Jason Lee, Blind Video Days)

Fuck That Shit

Something that has been interesting to me throughout my life is watching the way skateboarding constantly evolves and changes. More so than any other sport (except in some cases Basketball) one single single figure, or small group can completely change the style of skateboarding. This was true in the 70's with the Zephyr team, the 80's with the Bones Brigade, as well as many different skaters in the 90's and after. Visually the biggest difference is the fashion as skaters are very quick to jump on a trend and start dressing like their favourite shredders (Watch The Search For Animal Chin and you will immediately see why I dress the way I do). Remember when every suburban teenager started wearing purple and black "heart-agram" shit because Bam Margera did. Or when Hurley stocks went up a jillion points when Bob Burnquist had a Hurley shit on in Tony Hawk's Pro Skater? The same can be said today of all the kids trying to look like the Deathwish/Shake Junt teams.

The exact same thing happens in the style of tricks performed. Young kids skating obviously try to skate like their favourite skaters and do the same style tricks as them. Everyone is flipping in and out of grinds today because they grew up watching Koston do the same thing.

Basically what I'm trying to get at is that the trends in skating as well as skating itself is in constant flux and constantly evolving.

But something that has grown an astounding amount in popularity over the last few years is longboarding. I just do not get the appeal. When I first started skateboarding longboarding seemed to be a California-only thing for the hippies to do on their amazing selection of hills. As I went through university, I noticed more and more people starting to longboard to the point that now far more people longboard than "regular" skating. The only appeal I can see is that they are easier to cruise on and thus much more convenient if mobility is all you're looking for in a skateboard.

Rollerbladers have long been the mortal enemy of skateboarders, but I would wager that longboarders have now taken up that mantle. When I look at the reasons why I, myself loathe them so much I can't really pinpoint it. I used to say "You can't ollie on a longboard" but then I saw a group of kids bombing rails in New York on longboards (less lame, but still pretty lame). I often say "It's not a skateboard if you can wear sandals on it" but that doesn't really carry any weight and is more just me making fun of people who wear Birkenstocks to skateboard in.

After a lot of thinking though, I believe I've finally come to a conclusion. It's because no (or a very minimal amount) of longboarders were skateboarders before. So what has happened is that a huge population of people who aren't really "skateboarders" (This is a whole other fucking ordeal that I can't get into now.) have taken over the sport. For example, there is a skate shop in Guelph where I just moved out of that didn't sell any actual skate parts, only longboards. As a result of this, pretty much the only place someone can go to get  a new skateboard/skate parts is the West 49 in the mall. Which really sucks.

The culture surrounding longboarding is what pisses me off most about it. It started as something that was awesomely counter-culture. Skateboarding is illegal, street skaters got in the way, did things in places they weren't supposed to and weren't highly regarded. I got into skateboarding and punk music at around the same time (as many people did) and it seemed like a match made in heaven. In contrast to this is longboaring culture, which, as far as I can tell, consists of bros riding them to the library and hippies cruising around on them to be environmentally friendly.

And that fucking sucks man.

Also, complete non-sequitur but especially fuck people who refer to skateboards as "shortboards". That should be punishable by stoning.

It just really sucks to see something you've grown up loving so much to be completely overrun by a group of people who have absolutely nothing to do with the original ethos of the sport. Not to say that I'm a nihilistic badass with no regard for anybody who busts Smith grinds now 10 sets in front of cops, but there certainly is  a "I don't give a fuck" attitude that you take up a little bit the first time you buy a skateboard and that is definitely void in longboarding.

That, or I'm a jaded ass who hates everything.

Maybe a little of both?

But I suppose that even though most people actually ask me "Why don't you longboard?" when they see my deck, a bunch of turds can't ruin the inherent magic of landing sketchy ollies with your best friends in a parking lot. So I suppose that even though skateboarding is extremely mainstream at the moment because of figures like Rob Dyrdek (though he does build a ton of skateparks in places they are needed, so good on him) and Ryan Sheckler (though he does shred pretty fucking hard) and also overrun with goddamn longboarders, nothing can ever take away the magic trying to land a trick all day and finally stomping it at 12:30 with all your friends cheering you on.

That and some fuck is always going to be pissing off security guards by manualing around the front of a building. Which makes me smile.